Startups can be exciting arenas of innovation, filled with ambitious goals, rapid development cycles, and the allure of shaping the future. But when the pace becomes unsustainable, and personal values clash with company culture, the dream can quickly lose its luster. My recent experience at a machine learning inference startup taught me invaluable lessons about overwork, alignment, and the balance between idealism and pragmatism.

Why I Decided to Leave Link to heading

The decision to leave wasn’t easy, but it became necessary when I realized that the environment was not compatible with my personal and professional priorities.

  1. Overwork as a Default
    The company embraced a hustle culture where working over 10 hours a day and being on-call 24/7 was normalized. This wasn’t limited to crunch times—it was the baseline expectation. For someone with a newborn at home, this level of overwork was unsustainable and detrimental to my family life.

  2. Lack of Empathy and Transparency
    Despite knowing about my life situation, the company struggled to adjust its expectations. With no parents on the team, there was little understanding of what it meant to balance work and family. Additionally, expectations around work hours and deliverables weren’t clearly communicated during onboarding.

  3. Misaligned Values
    I joined with the goal of building resilient, scalable, high-performance systems while contributing to open-source projects—a passion of mine. However, the company prioritized rapid feature delivery and short-term metrics over reliability, sustainability, or open-source contributions. This fundamental misalignment created constant friction.

My Mistakes Link to heading

While the cultural mismatch played a significant role, I also made mistakes that compounded the challenges:

  1. Over-Optimizing Instead of Delivering
    I leaned into finding ideal solutions rather than delivering quick, practical implementations. In a fast-paced startup, speed often outweighs perfection.

  2. Focusing Too Much on Learning
    My desire to deeply understand and control every detail of the platform slowed me down. While this mindset works well in some roles, it was counterproductive in a high-pressure, delivery-focused environment.

  3. Prioritizing Reliability Over Features
    I instinctively gravitated toward improving system reliability and long-term sustainability, even when it was clear the company valued rapid feature delivery instead. This misalignment of priorities made my efforts less impactful in their eyes.

  4. Spending Time on Open Source
    I worked on improving and contributing to open-source tools, which I saw as valuable. However, the company didn’t share this enthusiasm, and my efforts were viewed as misaligned with their goals.

Lessons Learned Link to heading

Reflecting on this experience, I’ve taken away several key lessons:

  1. Cultural Fit is Critical
    No matter how exciting the technology or mission, if the company’s culture doesn’t align with your values, frustrations will inevitably arise. Startups that glorify overwork are not sustainable for someone who values balance.

  2. Clarify Expectations Early
    Misaligned expectations around priorities and success metrics can derail even the most skilled engineers. Asking detailed questions during interviews and onboarding is essential to ensure alignment.

  3. Balance Idealism with Pragmatism
    Striking a balance between delivering quick wins and building sustainable systems is key, especially in startups. Knowing when to prioritize speed over perfection is a crucial skill.

  4. Stay True to Your Priorities
    For me, being present for my family and maintaining a balanced life outweighs any professional ambition. Leaving the role wasn’t easy, but it was the right decision for my well-being and values.

Final Thoughts Link to heading

This experience was a humbling reminder of the importance of alignment—between personal values, company culture, and role expectations. While I’ve always thrived at the intersection of systems engineering and challenging problems, this chapter underscored the need for environments that respect the individual, not just the output.

Startups can be transformative experiences for those who thrive on rapid growth and ambiguity. But for those who prioritize balance and long-term thinking, it’s critical to choose an organization that values these traits. For me, this experience reaffirmed the importance of staying true to my values, even when the professional stakes are high.